Having lived with fibromyalgia for several years I am used to the disappointment that comes when I’ve made plans and have to cancel because I’m either too exhausted, too sore or have concentration issues. What I am not used to is the way it affects Alex’s life. His activities and chances to meet and play with other kids his age.
Take today for example we go to gymnastics on Wednesday mornings Alex gets to spend time with his big cousin, play on the spring floor, the apparatus and the trampoline. But because I am in so much pain and can barely walk without resembling The Hunchback of Norte Dame. I’m unable to take him AND that makes me feel like the worlds worst mother.
My mind is at war with itself. One half telling me that I should push through the incriminating pain so he can learn new skills. The other half saying that if I push through I’ll end up making myself worse and we have plans this weekend. I’m torn between self care and Alex’s development. Does that make me a bad mother? I have to do what’s best for both of us and unfortunately today that means no gymnastics.
So today’s plans may have changed but we will still have fun snuggling on the sofa together watching DVDs, playing and learning.
Has you Illness gotten in the way of your child’s activities?